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As anyone who hasn’t been hiding in an underground bunker will know, it is climate change week. The world, their wife and their team of advisors are descending upon Copenhagen for the World Climate Change conference, all trying to out-posture each other and ultimately ‘strike a deal’. What did poor Copenhagen do to deserve this circus?

Media frenzies like this can bring to light some strange phenomenon’s. This particular event has brought into sharp focus, the huge following of a new world religion. “The Enviro-crats”.

The enviro-crat is easily pigeonholed – a bit disillusioned, the type of person who might have been a little bit religious in a time before it became too hard ignore that traditional religion has caused most of the hurt, pain and war associated with this part of the world in particular. So what was needed, was a new religion – something a bit modern, something noble, worthy – oh yeah – Climate Change!

At a time when, more than ever, we need voices of clarity to get behind the causes of waste, pollution and ultimately climate change, what we have ended up with is the Enviro-crat. I mean, this new religion even has a pilgrimage now. Hoards of people are getting busses, boats, and trains this week – all the way from every part of the world to Copenhagen- just to be there to campaign about issues like…. how much oil we use for needless transport. Picture the conversation – “Yeah this is my 4th Climate conference this year, how many have you been to? What, just three? Wow! It’s been totally brilliant though – I’ve met some really cool people who are making such a difference, like Randolph – He’s so passionate about climate change (blushes). He’s part of a group that has been travelling all over the world to demonstrate. I mean they only fly when they have to and they always stay in tents” Yes that’s right – the GAP year has taken on a noble cause. Now let’s get this straight – far from being a climate change nay-sayer, there is no doubt in my mind that (as a member of the human race, with at least a few brain cells) our actions are rapidly laying waste to this beautiful big mess of a planet, that we call home. What worries me is the upside down logic of the disciples of this new religion.

I know the Gap year/wandering soul disciples have taken a bashing here so far, but there are worse; The Chattering classes (I could think of some more descriptive terms!) have turned environmental logic completely on its head, locked it in a single glazed Georgian bubble and put their fingers in it’s ears. We have all witnessed the sickening sight of ‘super mom’ looking smug and glancing around the checkouts for some kind of ‘green credibility as she say’s “no it’s okay, I have my ‘bag for life’” Bravo! But the small city on four wheels, with the emissions of a Russian Power plant, parked outside renders that smugness as nothing more than complete delusion.

But we surely are a smart bunch, aren’t we? Why can’t our clever, modern minds work out what is wrong? What is so difficult? Global issues like this are collections of individual actions, travelling all the way to Copenhagen to lambast politicians does not address the fundamental issues that have created the monster of ‘climate change’ in the first place. We individuals, with our individualistic goals, created this monstrous free word, where we can have what we want , all of the time. The everyday person has become the ‘consumer’, as consumption is more often than not, the everyday activity. We are even being hoodwinked by our own good intentions, with people unfortunately beginning to believe the green drivel, dripping off advertisements, posters, the lips of politicians & celebrities, like sticky environmental snot.

The consumer can become human once again, and influence the directions of society through their own actions. These actions start at home, in the immediate surrounds that your life actions impact upon, not in Copenhagen. So instead of taking 14 busses, 8 trains and a Volvo taxi to Copenhagen this week, do something worthwhile – stay at home and insulate your fucking attic!

Joe Laverty is an angry drummer for a band called Pocket Promise. See him in a warmer climate here on the Bandwidth site.